The Day I Wet My Pants

Kind of, but not what you think.  I just wanted to get your attention. Did it work?

So, I just realized earlier this week that I've never blogged about the day Big Sister was born, and what excitement that created.  Sure, Lee and I were excited and so were our parents....but I'm talking about the other excitement.  When my water broke at work!!

Granted, this was almost six years ago and my memory is generally pretty bad....but this is something I can remember every single detail about.  It was May 22, which was my due date, and we were scheduled for a staff meeting at work after lunch.  I spent all morning feeling pretty fat and miserable, and just out of sorts. I think I was trying to will that baby to come on out.  I was at the end of my rope; I even called HR that morning to tell them I wanted to go ahead and start my medical leave the next day.  I just couldn't handle being pregnant any longer.

My office mates were all planning to go out for lunch together.  I confided in one of my co-workers that I just wasn't hungry and didn't want to go.  After much protesting, she finally spilled the beans and told me they were planning a surprise baby shower for me over lunch.  Dammit.  So, off I went with them to Fuddruckers with a tortured smile.  I ordered a salad and just barely touched it; I just wasn't feeling well.  They showered me with gifts and we talked about my plans and my due date, and all those other baby things.

I suffered through lunch and we headed back to the office. I was riding with Autumn, in the car that she'd just got back from the upholstery shop.  Want to know why this is an important piece of info?  Oh, because the car seats were getting replaced due to water damage from getting flooded during a storm.  Yep, you know where this story is going.  I opened the car door to get out and.....oops...water broke.  Right there, in her car.  Now, at this point I wasn't sure if it was "my water" or if I peed myself, which wouldn't have been a shock either.  I was just thankful her poor car wasn't flooded again!

I went straight to the bathroom to assess the situation.  Luckily, I was fully padded (if you know what I mean), as I had been for several months due to the unpleasant effects of sneezing while pregnant. So really there was no mess; it was quite discreet.  I calmly told my office mates what had happened, they laughed about what could have happened in Autumn's car and.....HOVERED.  Seriously, I sat down at my desk to call Lee and all six of them stood in my doorway just watching me.  I felt like I was a zoo animal in a cage.  Did I look different? 

The best part of this story?  While everyone was hovering around and asking me questions, the (shall remain nameless) LONE MALE in the office was hiding.  Literally.  He went into the room next to my office and continued to talk to me through the wall.  He wouldn't even look at me!  The girls were enjoying his discomfort a little too much, I'm sure.  This young, single guy was visibly uncomfortable.  I finally had to explain to him that I was still fully clothed and that I wasn't contagious.  I think he was truly afraid I'd have that baby right there on my desk.  And every single staff meeting I was at with that guy for the next five years, he made sure to tell this story!

Lee was working that day about a half hour away from me.  He panicked and said he needed to go home to get the camera, if I could wait for him to come get me.  Sure, sure....I wasn't in any pain and I had people to watch me, errr....keep me company.  I went on about my work and there never was a staff meeting.  Either it was a cover up for the covert baby shower or I ruined everyone's productivity for the day.  Or both.

I finally got to the clinic, where they had to give me a stupid test to confirm that my water broke---REALLY? Apparently, evidence wasn't convincing enough.  They sent me immediately downstairs to check in.  The rest of the story gets a little more blurry.  I watched the American Idol finale while I labored for a few hours and  Lee went home to shower, since the doc said it would be a while.  I got the worst scare of my life when the monitor beeped and everyone on the floor ran into my room. They put me on oxygen and sent in the doctor on call.  Baby wasn't doing so great, so I had to have an emergency c-section.  Little bundle was born at 9:29 p.m., as my mom was just getting to the hospital.  And it took me two days to finally ask who won American Idol.


It was Jordin Sparks, if you must know.

May 22, 2007 or when I was still sane.