Conversation With My Kids

Girl Twin has always been the kid we knew we'd have to worry about. It's no secret; she's always up to something. I'm also fearful that the child doesn't have a filter. I've already apologized in advance to her kindergarten teacher, just in case.

She also is guilty of filling up my phone with selfies. As you can see, she loves the camera.

One thing that has surprised me is that Girl Twin has been letting me snuggle and rock her before bed again. One night when we were snuggling, we had this lovely exchange--

Me:  Sis, I sure love you.

Her:  (looking deep into my eyes) Can I touch your eyeball?

Ummm, no.

Then, when she got off the bus after school I noticed that her face was super red and flushed.

Me:  Why is your face so red?

Her: I attacked a kid.

WHAT?  I never did get the story on that one. Sheesh.

At least we aren't bored around here, right?

St. Patty's Day Shenanigans

My sweet, creative kids decided on the eve of St. Patrick's Day that they wanted to make a leprechaun trap in the back yard. I believe this is directly related to the little ones learning about leprechaun traps in preschool--who knew this was even a thing? I think it's getting some legs with the tiny tot set, similar to the Elf on the Shelf craze. Mama don't think so.

 

So, here I am, caught totally off guard over what to use to make (and bait) a leprechaun trap in the eleventh hour. Leave it to Big Sis to have a solution! She asked Siri what to do. Siri told us that leprechauns generally like to eat green foods and liquor; mainly whisky.

 

Being the crafty lot that we are, we searched the fridge for something that would qualify. We came up with some salad, a cucumber and a really, really old and stale beer from the back of the fridge. We used food coloring to dye the beer green and BAM! Leprechaun bait was born!

 

As for the trap, that was all up to the kids. They went into the back yard and rigged up the sandbox lid with a metal rod. Hey, whatever works. Right?

 

Here are pics from the next morning when the kids went out, with their beach crab nets, to check the leprechaun trap. Needless to say, we were all utterly disappointed that the elusive leprechaun was nowhere to be found. The jury is still out on whether it was so fast that it drank the beer and triggered the trap or that the wind blew down the lid. I guess we'll never know...

 

What I do love is that the seven-year-old was equally (if not more) excited and intrigued by the whole thing as were the four-year-olds. Pure magic, for sure. 

 

And, of course, Fergie didn't want to miss out on the action either. Also notice how my brave baby boy stood back so his sisters could open the trap and he'd "stand back and catch it." Sure, that's it.

Conversation With My Kids

A recent trip to the Botanical Garden of the Ozarks on a warm February weekend.

Last week's Razorback basketball game gave us the opportunity to introduce our kids to one of the best and most popular players in U of A history, Corliss Williamson. During halftime of the game, the school honored Corliss by hanging a banner in the arena. I have a particularly fond place in my heart for Big Nasty because we were in school at the same time; I spent many, many hours waiting in the cold just to get into the building to watch him play.

As Lee and I explained to the kids his nickname, "Big Nasty," there was a lot of giggling going on. I suppose it does sound like a funny name to a bunch of little kids who talk about poop and farts all the time. I could tell they were really not impressed. 

The next day, Lee and the twins picked me up for lunch. I took Boy Twin into the bathroom to wash up before lunch. As he jammed his paper towel into the trashcan, he jubilantly declared, "I slam dunked it, just like Big Stinky!" 

I'm so glad they enjoyed our history lesson. 

You Might Be From Northwest Arkansas If...

This morning, we were driving through downtown Springdale on our way to the kids' preschool Open House meeting.

 

As we drove down Huntsville Road, we pulled out in front of a live chicken-hauling semi truck, or a "chicken truck" as we call it. If you live here, you know what I mean.

 

Girl Twin:  EEEWWW, there's a chicken truck!

 

Boy Twin:  Don't get behind it, it will POOP on us!

 

*hysterical laughter from the back seat.

Conversations With My Kids

As always, there is no shortage of entertaining conversations with my kiddos. On any given day, any one of them will provide us with a ton of laughs. I'm always ready to jot down the really good stuff so I can log it here and always be able to look back and remember it.

 

Recently we were driving somewhere when a motorcycle stopped beside us at a stoplight. It was a chilly day, so the driver was wearing a ski mask.  Now I can't remember which kid said it, but I think it was Boy Twin:  "LOOK! It's a robber!" 

This happened, the other night at dinner.  

Big Sis: Mom, how old are you?

Me:  I'm 38. Why?

Big Sis:  How old is dad?

Me:  He's 40; reaaallly old.

Big Sis:  HAHAHA!  Dad will be a grandpa first!

Obviously, I don't think she quite understands how the grandparent thing works.  But I'm glad she does recognize that her dad is so much older than me.

Conversation With My Kids

I had another fun bedtime conversation with Girl Twin last week that I want to share.  I'll be honest, bedtime is not always fun for us simply because we are outnumbered and we have three kiddos who require a lot of assistance and attention.  Mainly, the little ones like me to lay with them (in separate rooms, of course) while they fall asleep.  While there are about eleventy million other things that need to be done during that time, I put them aside and lay with my kids.  This is when we have some of our best chats.

 

This particular night I was with Girl Twin and we got to talking about vacation.  Of course, she requested a trip to Disney.  I told her about the time we went when she was a toddler and promised a return trip when she's a little bigger.  We talked about the trip we are planning to "the lake" this summer and about swimming.  I then told her we might even try to go to Tulsa a few times.

 

Her:  "I like Tulsa dip."

 

Me:  (confused)  "Did we have Tulsa dip?"

 

Her:  "Yes! I like the red dip!" 

 

Ahhh, salsa dip!  Haha.

 

 

 

 

The same night, we laid in bed talking about school.  She said, "Why is it taking so long to get to Walker?"  (That's Big Sis's elementary school).  The kids are so ready for kindergarten!  I told her that she had to be able to spell and write her name before she can go to Walker.

 

So, I asked her to spell her name for me...which she did, flawlessly.

 

Then, I asked her to spell brother's name.  Again, easy peasy.  Then, I asked her to spell Big Sister's name.

 

"B-E-R-L-E-Y!"  (I think she thinks everything ends in LEY!")

 

 

I love that kid.

 

 

 

Conversation(s) With My Kids

It's no secret that I like to blog about the funny things that my kids say and do.  I don't capture these funnies to embarrass them later in life or even to embarrass them now; these are the sweet things that I want to remember many years from now when they are grown and gone.  These are the moments that make all the hard stuff worthwhile.  I'm not being dramatic; I'm serious.  In this house, we are either laughing or crying. And, as you can imagine, the laughing is much better.

***     ***    ***
 

A couple of weeks ago during bathtime, I had both twins in the tub.  Girl Twin was just singing her little heart out, as she has been doing a lot lately.  Sometimes, I can identify a song from her daycare or from the radio.  But either way, she has really started to sing to us a lot.  It's sweet.

So, as they were bathing--

Me:  Sissy, you are my good singer!  

Boy Twin:  Yeah, and I'm your good pooper! 

Boys will be boys.  (And, he's right.)

***   ***   ***

We had another funny going to school last week.  When we are captive in the car, I often feel like I'm in front of a firing squad, with each kid peppering me with "Hey, Mom!" or "Mom, Mom, Mom?", each fighting for my attention.  I've gotten to where I actually call on them when it's their turn to talk.  Otherwise, they are talking on top of the other and I can't field any questions.  And, of course, they always have such important things to say.

Boy Twin:  Is that Katy Perry on the radio?

Girl Twin:  Hey mom!  I saw a red ball in the grass!

Big Sis:  Mom!  Justin Bieber's IN JAIL!!!

Big Sis = Trouble

Yesterday Big Sis came home from school with a doozy of a story. Lee called me at work to see if I had heard anything about "this crazy story" she was telling him.

She was very matter-of-fact in her rendition of the details that her teacher said she didn't have to come to school today.  In fact, she swore that her teacher told her to stay home.  Now, I had heard nothing of this.  Big Sis explained that all of the kids in her class had been assigned a classroom "job," and that hers was to be on vacation and take the next day off. Now, that's some clever homework! I want that assignment!

For the next few hours, she kept insisting that she was correct in her understanding of the assignment.  So, being the high-tech and connected mom that I am, I sent her teacher a text to get the scoop.  She replied to my text immediately with several "LOLs and HAHAHA's."  Apparently, Big Sis got some of the info correct, but not all of it.  With 20 kids in her class, there were only jobs for half of them (line leader, pencil sharpener, door holder, etc). Big Sis didn't get assigned a job this week; therefore, she was on "vacation," and would get her turn at a job next week.  

So, we figure that my kid is either very literal in her comprehension of things, or worse, she's got a little Bueller in her.  If she's already trying to skip school in the first grade, at least we'll know to watch her close in high school!  I'm sure she takes after her dad. Bueller?  Bueller?  

Twin Tuesday (on Wednesday, of course!)

I tried to snap a quick pic of the kiddos this morning, but they weren't having it.  So this post will just not have any photos. However, I do want to share a couple of funnies from last week.

 

GIRL TWIN--

 

This happened as we were driving home from daycare one day last week.  We drove over the interstate and Girl Twin had a much better view than I did, as I was looking in front of me.  She excitedly yelled out, "Look! The popcorn truck!"  I clearly did not see a popcorn truck.  But, as I looked down at the cars passing below us, I did spot a semi truck with the Target bullseye on it!  Way to go, Tar-jay.  The kids know you and love you for your delicious bribery popcorn. 

 

BOY TWIN--

 

The kids are old enough now that they really pay attention to our surroundings when we are driving (see example above).  I've started giving them little "tests" to see if they know how to get from Point A to Point B.  Usually, it's "Which way do we turn now?" type of things.  So, as we were heading home from daycare again, we stopped at the stoplight near our house.  I asked the kids, "Which way is our house?"

 

Boy Twin knows the answer!  "Turn that way to go to our house," he said proudly, pointing in the correct direction.  Then, "Turn the other way to go to NOT our house."  HAHA.

 

These guys. At least they make me laugh sometimes.  It helps to balance out the crying (mine, not theirs).

The Slapstick Comedy Hour

Or, alternate title:  The Day My Kid (almost) Ate Poop

First, let me say this:  I don't really like taking my kids to the park. Before you shame me, let me explain.  The park is hard work, y'all!  Sure, the kids like to run and play and climb.  But who really does the hard work? The grown-ups, that's who.  ME.  Oh, I'd love the park if I could sit down and leisurely read a book while they play. But, no.  I have to push the swings (x 3) until my arms turn to jelly.  I have to run from the rock wall to the 8-foot-high ladder thingy to make sure one of my kids doesn't break (another) bone, and I have to make sure the bigger kids aren't being too rough with my little ones.  Three kids climbing on three different contraptions is tough.  I have more fun when Lee comes with us, if only to have two more hands and eyes to keep watch.  But I usually end up taking the kids to the park on Sunday afternoons when Lee is working at open houses.  It keeps me from strangling them at home.  

 

So, off to the park we go yesterday. The weather was perfect and I needed a stop at Sonic's happy hour.  Which brings me to another issue that we have.  My kids absolutely cannot, EVER--I repeat, EVER handle a Styrofoam cup.  It's borderline ridiculous. 

 

All the way from the van to the playground, I instruct the kids to be careful not to drop their drinks...because someone always does.  Every. Single. Time.  Boy Twin knows I speak the truth, so he just surrenders and hands me his slush to carry for him.  Smart kid.

 

Sometime right after Big Sis said to me, "Is that your phone in your shirt?" and I assured her that I didn't have a rectangle boob, she fell down.   Yes, from a standing still position. Just fell flat to her butt, knocking over her nearly-full orange slush.  The lid popped off and it spilled everywhere. But being the crafty mom that I am, I brushed off her butt and secretly poured some of brother's orange slush into her cup.  All good.

 

After our hour of play time is up, we head back to the van.  Along the way, we stopped for an impromptu photo shoot in a cool-looking tree.  Girl Twin, also knowing how clumsy she is, said "I'm gonna put my Sprite down over here so I won't spill it."  Then, approximately 30 seconds later, she proceeds to walk backwards over it.  Crushed the whole cup.  Thank you, Sonic happy hour. Now I've only wasted two bucks instead of four.

I get Girl Twin directed toward the trash and herd them all to the parking lot.  Here's where it gets real.  As I'm buckling the other kids into their seats, I can't find Girl Twin.  After I yelled her name, she pokes her head into the van, licking her fingers.

 

Now, I know I didn't bring any snacks to the park this time.  I'm all, "Hey, what are you eating?"  She answers, very calmly, "Chocolate" and holds up her dirty brown fingers for me to inspect.  Oh yes, like you, I'm immediately thinking she's just eaten some poop.  "Sissy, where did you get that," I asked.  "Down there," Big Sis answered for her.  "An almond," Girl Twin also supplied.  

 

I'm holding my breath as I round the front of the van to the other side.  I need to know what exactly she just put in her mouth.  And, for once, thank GOD she was right.

But yes, she did indeed eat melted chocolate off the parking lot of the park.  And yes, there were almonds.  The end.

Conversation With My Kids

It's been a while since the last CWMK, and I just happened to have the funniest conversation with them the other day.  We were on the way home from a birthday party for Big Sis's BFF.  These kids make me laugh every day!

Girl Twin was snoozing in the back seat, so she missed out on this one.  It went like this--

Big Sis:  I wish I was Dahana's sister so I could live with her.

Me:  You want to go live with her?

Big Sis:  Yes!  

Boy Twin:  (sadly, to Big Sis)  But I love you!

Me:  (to Boy)  Do you want to go with her?

Boy:  Yes!

(And I thought he was on MY side)

Me:  You guys would leave me and dad and go live with Dahana?

Big Sis:  Open the door! 

Me:  No way.  I cannot believe you.

Big Sis:  You can pick me up in 100 days.


Obviously, she felt sorry for me there.  Those kids.

Twin Tuesday

This week's Twin Tuesday goodness is brought to you by Girl Twin.  Twice in one week, she's had us laughing our heads off.  This girl.  I tell ya, she's a mess.

 

The other morning I was getting the kids ready for daycare.  It's always a frantic time, and this was no different.  Boy Twin was eating a waffle and apparently laid it in the floor when he came into the bathroom to get his hair brushed.  When he went back to get it, it was gone and he was crying.

 

Me:  Fergie!  Did you eat that waffle???  This, as the dog is walking out of the room with her guilty face on and her head hanging low.

 

Girl:  Fergie can't talk.  Only kitty cats can talk. (well, duh)

 

Me:  What do cats say?

 

Girl:  Meow!

 

 

Over the July 4th weekend, Girl Twin ran through the yard barefoot and bloodied her pinkie toe.  After a band-aid and much fuss, we got it to quit bleeding.  Then we realized the toenail wasn't going to survive.  Now, a week later she lost it.

 

We were spending the weekend at Grammy's when it happened.  I took her into the bathroom for yet another band-aid.  As I'm getting it on, she very seriously asked me if the tooth fairy was going to come get her toenail.  I said no.  Then she dropped it on the carpet and we never found it.  Have fun with that, Grammy!

Call it Stubborn, Independent or Whatever You Want...

Today is picture day at daycare.  The staff requested that all the children wear denim and white---jeans, skirts, overalls, whatever.  I guess they are going with a Western theme.  They told the parents this approximately 16 hours prior to photos, which I'm a little put out by, but that's for another story.

 

Today, this is about our children.  Our stubborn, hard-headed, independent, do-it-myself kids.  I've waited years for these kids to be able to dress themselves and lighten my load a little, so you'd think there's really  nothing to complain about here.  But the thing is, we are in that stage where they want to choose what to wear (no matter the practicality or comfort level) and they want to dress themselves (and put shoes on the wrong foot).

 

So, I put together some clothes this morning and they weren't having it.  So for western day, my kids wore rain boots and nothing denim.  Yee haw!  And you know what?  I don't really care.  It's exhausting to fight about it when it doesn't really even matter.  The photographer will slap a toy cowboy hat and bandanna on them, and they will look ridiculous, and it still won't matter.  I'm not going to buy the damn pictures anyway because the school insists on taking photos every 3 months and it totally irritates me.  Why is this necessary?

 

Today's drama also got me thinking about a text conversation I had with a good childhood friend a few months back. I saved the text because I knew it would somehow end up on this blog.  It's a gem.  She's got a daughter who is the same age as Big Sis, so we often compare notes on phases, attitude, kindergarten and general 6-year-old smartassedness.  That is a word, no?  Here's the basic convo:

So, why am I sharing this?  Because it makes me feel better.  Because I  know that other moms are having the same issues with their stubborn, independent children, too.  It's OK to laugh, because this was funny.  But it's also OK to shake your head and say "yep," because you've been there.  And you get it.  No matter how much we think we are teaching our kids, or helping our kids or whatever.  The bottom line is they will still occasionally leave the house without underwear on.  Or, in our case, Spiderman rain boots on western day.  And really, it doesn't matter.

Conversation With My Kids

Last night, the kids were playing at my feet in the kitchen (as usual).  Boy Twin was being mean to the dog, but I'm still not sure what happened.  He probably either hit her or threw something at her.  Bless her heart, Fergie puts up with a lot of crap from those kids.

Big Sis:  Aww, Fergie, are you OK? (giving her a hug)

Pause.

Girl Twin:  She's not talking.

Those kids.

Twin Tuesday

It's Twin Tuesday...or is it Freaky Friday?  The kids insisted on trading pj's last night.  Boy Twin looks smashing in the Dora jammies with the ruffled sleeves, no?  Silly, silly kids.

Conversation With My Kid

This little girl has been cracking us up lately.  She's very bossy to the twins, but she also loves them with all her might. Sometimes she even surprises me. Like last night, she asked Boy Twin if he wanted to sleep with her favorite blankie and stuffed bunny. I can't remember a night when she hasn't slept with them herself!  And, she's also been helping the little ones wash in the shower, which is a nice help to me.

The other day, getting out of the bath, she said to me: "Mom. Sometimes, like when we go to Walmart, we see people with big booties."  Out of nowhere!  I couldn't help but laugh at her perceptiveness.

It's Twin Tuesday!

In sticking with my music theme from the past week or so, I want to share some cuteness about the twins.  They are finally sharing in the fun of music!  Every day, on the way to daycare and back, they insist on listening to their favorite CD in the van.  They totally dig Brian and Terri Kinder, at Kindersongs.  We heard about them years ago from some friends, and first went to see them in a holiday concert at the Fayetteville library when Big Sis was just a toddler.  Since then, we've become quite the groupies.  They usually have 2-3 shows a year at the library, and I'm not sure we've missed any.  If you have little kids, I highly recommend taking them to see the Kinders. They play all over the state, so the chances are good that you can find them in your hometown.  

Now, the twins have learned to love music, too. I'm so proud! Whether it's Christmas music, the Muppets Soundtrack or just regular radio, it's the cutest thing EVER when I can hear them singing along from the backseat.  It's amazing how many words they can remember and sing!

Clever little stinkers, aren't they?

Conversations With My Kids

These kids just keep providing the doozies! I can't help but stop to jot it down when they say something funny or cute. My memory is terrible, and these are the things I want to remember when they are all grown up.  Or at least, grown up enough to be embarrassed by my re-telling of stories around the dinner table.

The other night Girl Twin came home from daycare in a really good mood. She was helping me with dinner in the kitchen, singing in her sweet little voice, "Bible story, Bible story, Biiiiblllle stoooorrryyyy....."

Me:  Did you learn a Bible story at school today?

Her:  Yes!

Me:  Was your story about Jesus?

Her:  No. About God (long pause).....and Cinderella.

OK then. I'm glad she's paying attention!

We have a big cup that I've been drinking out of a lot lately; it's got red and black polka dots on it.  We were in the van, heading to dinner with Grammy and Nanny, when this happened.

Him:  I see coconuts!

Me:  What? What are you talking about?

Him:  (pointing at cup) Those coconuts!

Me:  These are POLKA DOTS.

Him:  Oh, Polka Nuts! I like Polka Nuts.

It's Twin Tuesday!

 

Here's a new photo of my babies, who aren't really babies anymore. It just dawned on me this week.  I even asked Lee if maybe we should stop referring to them as "the babies," as we have for 2.5 years now. But what will we call them?

 

These two always want to sit in my lap at the same time, and sometimes with Big Sis, too.  The other night as they were elbowing and kicking each other for a spot, this is the conversation that happened.

 

Me:  Stop pushing! There was room in my belly for two babies, so there is room on my lap for you both.

 

Boy Twin:  (kicking sister) Move your leg!

 

Girl Twin: Don't be (his) mommy!

 

That girl. All sass, all the time.

Conversation With My Toddler

There is a house with a pasture right next to our daycare.  In the pasture is one lone brown horse.  Every day since July, we've seen the horse and talked about the horse. We talk about what the horse eats (grass) and if the horse is hot or cold, and where he sleeps. It's riveting conversation, let me tell you.

 

Recently, we named the horse Bullseye (Toy Story).  It's really fun for us to wave and yell "good morning" to Bullseye as we drive past. Every. Day.

 

This morning I said to the kids, "What does Bullseye eat?", and I hear this reply from the back seat.

 

"Bullseye eats CHILI!"  Thanks for the laugh, Girl Twin.